Sunday, March 1, 2009

sometimes i can't decide if i hate ska or if i fucking hate ska

i've had this massive headache for like five days.

there is another lesion that is suspect. sometimes i wish that i knew it was terminal, or that the doctor gave me a window of time. then i would take out a massive loan and do things/take trips that i want to do before i die but always seem to put off for bullshit reasons like work or school or whatever. you know, stuff that "matters", but really at the end of the day when all is said and done, it shouldn't/doesn't. instead i work two full time jobs to pay for all this crap.

i've been doing so well. tonight i drank three tall cans, and i was great at the the party i attended. everyone was nice and welcoming and the conversation was pleasent, but now i am at home in my dark room by myself. today was the first day i really noticed that the days are getting longer. the temp only reached like 25F, but the sun didn't set until nearly 6pm. before we all know it, it'll be summertime around here.

i am currently channeling the late 90s. riding in pos tanks of cars, bench seats the size of couches, speeding along crowned country roads down on the flood plain, the sweet ropey scent of the marijuana overpowering the cabbage harvest while the city lights burned orange haze to the west, listening to the radio.

queen anne's lace was always my favorite wild flower. they used to grow tall and bushy along the bottoms under the bluff. right now i miss some one. i'm not sure who exactly. i could even be missing some one who is now a figment of my imagination. but this person is innocent like me in my mind right now. we are running through a field of flowers as tall as our foreheads. the stars burn white diamonds in the black sky and jasmine fills the night air. we are the only two people in the universe tonight as we sprint through tall weeds until our lungs burn and as one we collaspe laughing onto the prairie dusty from the summer drought.

the first show i ever attended was in 1998 at the galaxy with courtney key. we went after swim team practice on a friday. the bands were link 80, voodoo glow skulls, and buck 0 nine. apparently, little carl has come across footage of this show, and also apparently, nate x and chris, shaun and alyssa, and ron and wipfler, were all at that show, way before any of us knew each other. i left before all the bands had played b/c another friend was hosting a birthday party that night. when i arrived, a lot of the guests had filtered out, and she kissed me in the basement. full on on the mouth. that was the first time for anything for me, and another seven or eight months would laspe until my lips touched a boy's.

this video is kinda weak, but the song is taking me back to a time i want to remember right now:



i also always really liked this one: goddamn. i could hang out with truesdale everyday for the rest of my life.



and can't forget: i always liked this band when i was in hs. andy roberts was in the same lunch as me, and he always wore this t shirt. he was always such a dick to me on the bus, and one day, he was just gone. of course there was the usual rumors about him being comitted and shit. i never found out what really happened.



i also went to see this band when i was in hs, and this was the first time i remember being in a situtaion of utter chaos, and it felt right.




i just love this song, and i love this band. my earliest memory of weasel is sitting in study hall with chad pogarelik and he borrowed a ccs catalog i had and cirlced all the records he wanted to order. this song, in all its recordings, is probabably my most favorite.



and of course i have to include an oldies version. i have selected a johnny nash televised performance.









I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.

I think I can make it now, the pain is gone
All of the bad feelings have disappeared
Here is the rainbow I’ve been prayin for
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.

Look all around, there’s nothin but blue skies
Look straight ahead, nothin but blue skies

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.

No comments:

Post a Comment